Hi Everyone, I hope your doing well. Well I did it, I applied to UMass Boston, I unfroze!! I talked over some things with my counselor about getting my Master's Degree and she suggested the fastest way to get me back out in the workforce. They offer a certificate in Gernotology which is just a few classes short of a Master's Degree in the field. I can work sooner and finish my Master's while getting experience. I am going to look into volunteering at the local Hospital too in their new Gernotology Department, that way I get my foot in the door and then hopefully I can stay their when I finish the certificate! So as soon as I got home that day I applied, for some reason it gave me the confidence to try. I am going to call my counselor EM for now on when I write about her. She has become my only women friend right now and it is nice to have someone besides your family that truly cares for you. She told me last week that she makes me visit her weekly to make sure I don't fall into a deep depression, because she said she might herself being in my shoes and she feels bad that I have to go through what I do, even though it was my fault. She just shakes her head at all I have to do to pay for my mistake. She keeps reminding me that what I did was just a poor choice, learn from it and still love yourself. Finally someone that has a little compassion! Tonight as I finished my walk on my treadmill, for a moment I cried because I began to think about that, that I have no girlfriends around to talk to, to go out with and that hurt. What ever happened to a tried and true friend? Someone who stood by you when you needed them and accepted you, faults and all. I know how our lives get busy and we can just always facebook, but I miss the real thing. If not for Em and my family watching out for me I realize I would have probably slipped into a deep depression by now. I have been there some days and that is not where I want to stay. This poem really is what I am feeling tonight and I wanted to share it with those of you who can relate. I'm just someone who needs a kind word, forgiveness. I was walking to this song tonight because can relate to this song from Michael as well, not to the degree he did, but I know what it is like to feel judged. And I know I will not lose faith that in the future as I travel down these new paths I will find that special friend and truly feel free of my past and judgements.
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Don't You Wrong or Right Me!